Parting the Myst

and he awoke...


So my Doctor tells me on Firday that my latest issues (pulse,numbness,tingling,breathing,etc) are all in my head. Great, there goes my excuse for sitting around watching nothing all day. Then he has the nerve to tell me to get back to living my normal life. Oh sure! Easy for him to say - he doesn't have an eye trying to pop out of his skull! But he is right, of course, much as I don't like to admit it. Our physical lives can really take a toll on our spiritual and emotional lives. SO while I do have headache issues and according to the nuerologist those are gonna stick around a month or two, I have been causing myself some severe stress over my constant watching of physical symptoms. So I have been making myself more sick than I really am by my subconscious worrying. Do I even need to draw the Spiritual parallels for you on this one? I do this with God all the time. I take what may be either nothing, or something small in his economy and I worry it into something gigantic and dehabilitating. That sucks. My doctor says I need to feel free to live normal life. The past 2 days I have been trying to and you know what, I feel as if the myst parted. I feel as if I woke up. I feel pretty darn good...


Can I say how much I love Fall. Even though right now the weather is 89 degrees I know it will get cold again and I love it.

-September schools start up and the newness, the unbridled potential for amazing life changing events occurs within the scholastic world. Not to mention college football begins.

-October comes along and the change of seasons begins (well everywhere but Southern California). This is my birthday month so no surprise that it is part of my favorite season. Not to mention baseball playoffs begin.

-November brings the harvest and Thanksgiving and the beginning of the great food and family festivity weeks. Not to mention one can feel Christmas hanging around the edges of one's life. Plus this is the month that USC usually beats up on Notre Dame (I know they lost to Stanford but you can't win all your games at home so it was destined to happen sometime).

-December for me is a rush of emotion. Not including seeing friends, Christmas carols, classic Christmas TV shows, wrapping gifts, Christmas decorations, and all the Christmas goodies, I have to admit I enjoy the crazy shopping times. These aren't a chore or a waste of time, they are a few hours of relationship building for each person I buy for. Though these people don't know it, my heart and mind are connected to them as I take the time to find that which may not be on their list but once recieved is cherished and appreciated as a token of being known and understood. I love the risk that is involved in buying for people something specific. Relationship is all about risk, and Christmas can be one of the more relationally risky moments of the year. And yes I do think the idea of giving gifts compliments the reality of Christ's birth quite well. This is a celebration. This is a time to remember that God gave his greatest gift and Christ risked all for relationship with us. This is a month that for some reason I feel more connected with Him than any other time of the year. It's also a month to snog with my wife by the fireplace and in front of the Christmas tree. Not to mention all the College football bowl games begin. I know it's not everybody's favorite time, and for many it may bring up painful family experiences but for me it is a spiritual retreat, and one that I am thankful for...


Well that's more than I intended to write so I hope all is well in the worlds of our friends, and

Happy Fall...


-Jason

thank you cards

so last night i had a dream that we were going from doctor to doctor (isn't my subconsious creative?), but along the way we were stopping to write thank you cards and send thank you gifts. i'm not quite sure if they were to the doctors or to friends or what ... but when i woke up i was so aware of how thankful we really are right now. we have such a GOOD Father. so this morning i wanted to write this short note as a thank you card to Him.

spinal tap thursday

okay, not every thursday, just this thursday. if you read this before then, lift J up since they'll be sticking a needle in his spine. should tell us a lot, though, so that will be good. thanks!

filling in the blanks

wow, how sad that we're so much worse at keeping this up-t0-date now that we have internet at our fingertips just about 24/7. umm, yeah ...

so the last three weeks have been, well ... exhausting. we've been in and out of doctors' offices, labs, specialists, and each other's arms as we try to find an idea or two about the craziness in jason's head - no, not his loveable and zany wit, but headaches, vision issues, numbness in arms and head/face, swollen eyelid, small pupil, pounding metal in rythym with his heartbeat, sleep paralysis, etc., etc., etc.

we have been receiving EXCELLENT medical care and attention, but right now we're in the place where we've ruled out a lot (all the serious stuff like stroke, anurism, hemorraghing) but still have the doctors scratching their heads in fascination of a weird combination of symptoms.

in the midst of all this, we moved to corona (yay), and i have been re-adapting into a work-from-home schedule to juggle.

we have been so blown away by the countless reminders from our Dear Father that He is intimately involved and keeps providing in amazing ways. around random bends in the road, from work phone calls right when we need it, to dinner being brought over by friends at church , to an anonymous envelope with cash (hello!?), to other surprises, there is no way we can question that He wants us to KNOW He is at work.

so that's us. we're tired. we've had to apply a lot of this year's life lessons this month, especially Who to Fear. but we're together, so we're good.

Door #2

So, it's been some busy days. Lots going on - moving to Corona, working hard on what comes while watching our funds dip lower and lower, visiting doctors and hearing fun things like "hmmm, weird". I mention it all not to complain but because with all that have come reminders of lessons we learned that need to be put into practice - we can fear everything, or fear God. We choose door #2. He's provided an abundance of practical reminders that He's two steps ahead.

Now in the midst of this crazy week, we got an email from a friend in Bangladesh - yeah, turns out they've got a flood covering most of their districts. He sent some pictures and all week they've been in my head. Reminding me what to be thankful for here. And what to pray for our brothers and sisters there. The pictures are pretty intense and I'm going to upload them here even though they're pretty small. Let them remind you, too ...